The 100 Worst New Yorkers, Ranked

Donald Trump: Bad New Yorker? Or THE WORST New Yorker?

It’s easy to come up with a list of the best New Yorkers because it begins and ends with Pizza Rat. But it’s even easier to come up with a list of the worst New Yorkers, because so many of us are so, so terrible, and have been, always, throughout history. This isn’t a historical list though, everyone on it is alive. Or fictional. Which is like being eternal. So. 

100) Aidan from Sex and the City

99) Alec Baldwin

98) “Jerry” from Seinfeld

97) These Brooklyn Tinder dudes

96) People who act like entitled jerks when their subways are delayed

95) Al Sharpton

94) Jonathan Safran Foer

93) Jerry Seinfeld

92) Holden Caulfield

91) James Frascatore

90) That man I saw shaving on the F train one time

89) Anthony Weiner (ironic, because: Carlos Danger is one of the 100 best NYers)

88) Kris Gounden

87) Victor Einhorn

86) Harry Einhorn

85) Taylor Swift

84) Whoever coined the word “hipsturbia

83) NYU

82) Dov Hikind

81) The Environmental Protection Agency from Ghostbusters

80) Moby

79) Barbara Walters

78) The prom queen of Instagram

77) The parents of the prom queen of Instagram

76) Nate from The Devil Wears Prada

75) Joel and Amram Israel

74) Guy Woodhouse

73) Terry Richardson

72) Steve Ranazzisi

71) The subway pole-hog

70) Vanessa from The Cosby Show

69) Berger on Sex and the City

68) Andrew Lombardo

67) William Kristol

66) Matt Lauer

65) Jen Polachek

64) Jane Pratt

63) Shoshanna on Girls

62) Alex Rodriguez

61) Every teenager

60) Ronan Farrow

59) That woman yelling “BOOBS! I SEE YOUR BOOBS!” at every woman wearing anything other than a turtleneck who was getting on the G train that one afternoon last summer

58) Graydon Carter

57) Dennis Duffy from 30 Rock

56) Woody Allen

55) David Denby

54) Domenic Recchia

53) The milkshake squirrel

52) Michael Grimm

51) Don Lemon

50) The person that controls the air conditioner in my office building

49) Sean Hannity

48) Bernard Kerik

47) The entirety of the now-defunct Pussy Posse

46) That couple who hit that jogger with their stroller

45) That jogger who got hit with a stroller and yelled about white privilege

44) Charles “Joe” Hynes

43) Andrew Cuomo

42) You know who you are

41) Charles Schumer

40) Harry Crane from Mad Men

39) David H. Koch

38) These doctors

37) Every person who has clipped their fingernails on public transportation

36) Archbishop Timothy Dolan

35) Bill Keller

34) The creepy locksmith on Broad City

33) Ray Kelly

32) That neighbor I always run into on the subway who talks a lot about his trapeze lessons

31) Vito Lopez

30) Andrea Peyser

29) Eric Trump

28) Barron Trump, probably

27) Dan on Gossip Girl

26) Ross on Friends

25) Roger Ailes

24) That neighbor I always run into on the subway who talks a lot about being a naturalist

23) That person who makes sure to say they’re a native New Yorker within five minutes of meeting them

22) Donald Trump Jr.

21) This guy who threw his dog in the garbage

20) Daniel Pantaleo

19) Charles Schwarz

18) Justin Volpe

17) Sean Carroll

16) Richard Murphy

15) Edward McMellon

14) Kenneth Boss

13) Bedbugs

12) The UPS delivery person who won’t just leave my package by my door even though it doesn’t need to be signed for and I wrote a note asking just please please leave it by my door!

11) Marnie on Girls

10) Greg Kelly

9) The guy behind the Castle Braid Twitter account

8) Martin Shkreli

7) Ivanka Trump

6) Elisabeth Hasselbeck

5) Jared Kushner

4) That one guy on my block who NEVER picks up his dog shit

3) Rudolph Giuliani

2) Pat Lynch

1) Donald Trump

Follow Kristin Iversen on twitter @kmiversen

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4 COMMENTS

  1. Hannah Horvath / Lena Dunham and company.
    Carrie Bradshaw and Co., esp/ Samantha, plus their real-life spawns, the Carrie Bradshaw wannabes.
    Noah Bermanoff.
    The Conecticut trust-funders moving to Williamsburg.
    Virginia K. Smith.

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