This morning I woke up to my roommate cackling. She had stumbled upon the Trump Insult Generator.

It’s more than a year old, but never has it been more timely. Yesterday, the New York Times did a hell of a job demonstrating how Republican Presidential Nominee Donald Trump’s ego hinges on insulting intelligent and accomplished people and institutions with tweets that real seven year olds would write. (David Brooks is a “dummy!” Mitt Romney is “so awkward and goofy,” and “one of the dumbest and worst candidates in the history of Republican politics.” Bernie Sanders, Donald spitballs, “just wants to shut down and go home to bed.” Chuck Todd of Meet the Press has “sleepy eyes”. (Ed. note: hahahahaha) Bill Kristol is also a “dummy”, opinion writer Charles Lane of the Washington Post is “a real dope” and Germany, the country, is “a total mess-big crime”. Yeah, tell it like it is, Donald.)

There are thousands of them, and their visual composite (two whole pages in yesterday’s New York Times print edition) requires no explicit takeaway. But, OK, if I must: A man only insults in others what he most fears in himself.

But I digress. Back to the Trump Insult Generator unleashed last summer. Use it now, it’s a good time. Just type your name in the little box, and enjoy the thrill of being a target of some of Donald’s most choice tweet insults.





But this, above all, is my favorite:


Admittedly, do it more than a handful of times, and it gets repetitive. Nonetheless, it’s worth five minutes of your time. After all, when you see your name attached to some of these insults, you are free. At least that was my experience. Maybe I am Hokey garbage, but I’m probably a little better than that. No one is literal hokey garbage. And it can’t get any worse than that. So, gracias, hombre, for showing us rock bottom, and thereby gifting us a future that is disappointingly less hysterical but, importantly, better.


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