Staten Island Lawyer Seeks to Settle Lawsuit via Battle to the Death, Literally


A Staten Island lawyer is seeking to shirk the legal system by implementing a brutal rule of his own: mortal combat. Richard Luthmann, who more closely resembles a bearded carpet-salesman than an attorney, sought to settle a civil suit last week through fisticuffs, asking a judge to formally sanction a fight to the death between himself and the plaintiffs involved. 

According to the Staten Island Advance, Luthmann framed his pugilistic request in especially terse and medieval rhetoric, like a twelfth century barbarian, or something:

Luthmann wrote in a brief filed in state Supreme Court:

The allegations made by plaintiffs, aided and abetted by their counsel, border upon the criminal. As such, the undersigned (Luthmann) respectfully requests that the court permit the undersigned to dispatch plaintiffs and their counsel to the Divine Providence of the Maker for Him to exact His divine judgment once the undersigned has released the souls of the plaintiffs and their counsel from their corporeal bodies, personally and or by way of a champion.

The invincible Luthmann, who’s known for wearing powder-blue suits and bowties, is an avid Game of Thrones fan, according to the Advance. His request calls to mind scenes of sword-swinging, blood-splattered gore, in which characters from the HBO show engage in heated battles to settle disputes.

Luthmann might be taking this particular case to heart, as he’s named specifically in the complaint, which alleges he helped a client fraudulently transfer $50,000 worth of assets to avoid prosecution in a previous case. Apparently antics like these aren’t necessarily that unheard of when it comes to the lawyer, who once mounted a short-lived run for Staten Island Borough President. He’s also been arrested for a DUI, although the charges were dropped shortly afterwards.

Whether Luthmann will eschew his goofy suits for an axe and armor in the coming months remains to be seen, but we’re guessing his savage fantasies will continue to take place only on TV.

Follow Sam Blum on Twitter @Blumnessmonster


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