Ridge rules, haterz! Bay Ridge is the best neighborhood in Brooklyn to raise your children, according to a new report, the Daily Newsreported, thanks to its “high counts of home ownership, parents with stable jobs and good schools.” The Ridge ranked fourth in the city, while kid-crazy Park Slope came in fif-muthafuckin-teenth, because it has more economic diversity, which presumably means less home ownership and economic stability. (Though not mentioned in the report, it may also be that Park Slope ranks low because it’s one of those neighborhoods where parents have to wait on lines for everything kid-related like summer-camp signup.)
This means that Bay Ridge now faces not only the coming hipster invasion it has been promised but also a yuppie one. Fellow Ridgites: protect your housing stock! Guard your schools! They’re coming.