10 Gifts That Will and Won’t Get You Laid

Even the Krampus celebrates Valentines Day

  • Even the Krampus celebrates Valentine’s Day

If you’re a last minute Valentine’s Day shopper, this list will steer you in the right direction toward, you know, bliss and emotional satisfaction and true love and everything else that Valentine’s Day is supposed to represent. Gift-giving seems so simple, doesn’t it? I mean, how can someone screw up doing something that is designed to make the other person happy? It turns out that it’s actually very easy to do that. It’s very easy to do that because people are ungrateful assholes about gifts. If the gift isn’t perfect, it can ruin everything. Which probably means your relationship wasn’t so great to begin with, but whose is? So I’ve put together a list of the best Brooklyn gifts that are made for making your partner happy. But also, as a warning, I’ve also included some that will be greeted with the dead eyes that mean that they don’t love you anymore and won’t even be down for a mercy fuck. Really, you don’t want to screw this up.



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