Taylor Swift put out a new song last night, and it is bad.
Not like Michael Jackson Bad, with a capitial B, which is in fact good. Like…this song is bad, bad.
It’s Taylor’s first song since last year’s 50 Shades team-up with Zayn, “I Don’t Wanna Live Forever,” which is about as good as a theme song for an erotic thriller can be. That coming after 2014’s 1989, which, honestly, I think was a really great pop album. I played the crap out of that thing for a while, no shame at all.
This new song, “Look What You Made Me Do,” is the first single off of her newly announced album Reputation, which will be out this fall. The album, and, by proxy, this single was teased for a little bit of time, with the megastar blanking her social media accounts, then posting weird twitchy snake videos.
Anyway, this song literally interpolates “I’m Too Sexy” by Right Said Fred (they have writing credits on the song), and it combines that ridiculous beat, with a constantly repeated refrain of “Look What You Made Me Do” (who would’ve guessed?) and a general attitude of Taylor being dark and edgy and intense, because that is what she is like now, of course.
The most cringe-worthy moment on this totally cringe-worthy song comes at the end of the song, when Taylor, describing herself, answers a mock hypothetical phone call:
*through some random distortion that I assume is what Taylor thinks an answering machine sounds like*
“I’m sorry, the old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now. Why?
***music drops out, so we know she means business***
Because she’s dead
And with that, you have it: Taylor Swift is officially tough and dark and angsty now.
Here’s the song via Spotify:
And here’s a sneak peak of the video for the song, which will debut this weekend at the MTV Video Music Awards: