I’ve written a lot about food here at Brooklyn Magazine. A lot of it’s been pretty straight food writing, about sandwiches and pizza, and then there have been the posts about food that looks like a vagina and the severed human toe cocktail. But it’s been a while since I’ve come across anything new that’s excited me as much as this, vegan-friendly, alcoholic popsicles that look like crystal molecules. I mean, I’ve never been that into molecular gastronomy until now. But now? I want a blue meth popsicle.*
*Not in any way what they’re actually called.
No, in fact, these scientific looking popsicles are called Kyl21 and have also been called, by creator David Marx and his team at The Science Kitchen, “the world’s first molecular popsicle.” As explained on Wired, “Kyl21 got its arty name by combining ‘Molekyl,’ the Norwegian spelling of molecule, and the age at which patrons need to be to enjoy one of the Science Lab’s rum-infused pina colada bars or their vodka-based ‘swimming pool’ flavored pops.” And, so really, there’s no need to make any more of a hard sell. I don’t need to be pressured into consuming a food that’s been engineered to distribute as much frozen, alcohol-laced goodness as possible by increasing the surface area of the popsicle. And what makes my mouth water more than hearing that something tastes like a swimming pool? I don’t know! I can’t think of it. It’s certainly more appetizing than a severed human toe, I’ll tell you that much.
Unfortunately, these popsicles are only currently available in Berlin, so unless you want to make the trek to Germany, you’re out of luck for now. But maybe that’s a good thing? Because these treats bear a striking resemblance to rock candy, yes, but also to blue meth on a stick (which, I think, is a thing) and we already know that the NYPD has had a hard time differentiating between Jolly Ranchers and meth in the past. What I’m saying is, I can’t wait to have one of these popsicles, but I am going to enjoy it in the relative safety of my own home, where there are no overzealous cops who clearly have no idea about what drugs actually look like.
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