Why Is Dating In Brooklyn So Hard? (Hint: Blame Brooklyn Women)

Haha. This was a movie! A real movie. What. Ha.

  • Haha. This was a movie! A real movie. What. Ha.

Dating, man. It’s rough, isn’t it? Ha. I don’t know. I eschew all romantic attachments because I have emotional intimacy issues that I am not prepared to talk about now, or possibly ever. But also, I’ve heard that dating is rough even for people who aren’t emotionally dead (I’m assuming those people exist?), or that’s what I’ve known to be true anecdotally. Well! Anecdotal evidence can now go to hell because there is finally proof (scientific proof!) that dating in Brooklyn is hard, not because of intimacy problems, but because women in Brooklyn are super-picky. That’s right, ladies, the problem isn’t them, it’s you.

Dating website Are You Interested (AYI) released data culled from over 50,000 single Americans that conclusively proved one thing: women in Brooklyn are more selective than women anywhere else in the entire country. Even in the tri-state area, women here in Brooklyn are far more choosey than those hoydens over in Murray Hill or, like, Jersey City. Which, obviously, right? New York magazine reveals that there are, in fact, some other places in the country where women are kind of picky (Detroit, Minneapolis, Cincinnati, and Los Angeles) and other places where women will sleep with basically anyone (Miami, St. Louis, Las Vegas, and Portland, Oregon), but nothing beats Brooklyn in terms of highly selective women. To which I say, good for you Brooklyn women! Good for you for not settling for some dude who tries to get your attention by sending some lame message like “whatsup” or “hey, your cute.” Those men should never be encouraged. Demand poetry. And I don’t mean repurposed Bob Dylan lyrics (even though, sometimes, that can actually work really, really well. See also: Bruce Springsteen’s “I’m On Fire”).

Anyway, even though AYI didn’t reach any conclusions based upon this data, I have to say I think we should all be especially impressed with these statistics. Because if there’s anywhere in this country where women shouldn’t be too picky about finding a mate, it’s Brooklyn. Why? Because it’s so fucking expensive here, that it is shocking that more people don’t just match up haphazardly in order to move in together and save on rent. Because if people in Brooklyn did do that, it would be totally understandable. It costs a lot of money to be single here! And yet, despite the odds being stacked against them, Brooklyn women still won’t settle for less than they deserve. This is awesome. Keep on being awesome, Brooklyn women. Sure, you might die alone and broke. But that’s better than being attached to some douchebag who doesn’t deserve you.

Follow Kristin Iversen on twitter @kmiversen