Lest we ever forget: The Internet is a killer. It is not safe to let down our guards for even one minute around the Internet; it really isn’t. Don’t believe me? Well, here’s a partial list of things that Internet has killed over the years: the newspaper star, profit, and, uh, 50 things. But the latest thing the Internet has killed is something I take very personally, because, unlike newspaper stars or 50 things, it’s something that I actually love very much: Ramen.
What’s that you’re saying? Ramen’s not dead? Ramen is available all over the place and is more abundant than ever before? Well, EXACTLY. The Internet has killed ramen by making it ubiquitous and bastardizing its very essence. Look, I’m not asking you to believe me. Believe an expert: David Chang. Today, on the just launched, super-awesome website for food magazine Lucky Peach, chef extraordinaire David Chang (going by “Dave”) writes about the “State of Ramen” and (spoiler), it is not good. And the reason why it’s not good is simply this: “[T]he Internet’s changed everything. People can get all the information they want instantaneously, and that has killed innovation in ramen.” Chang argues that instead of the authentic type of evolution that happens over the course of a long period of time, wherein changes in cuisine develop organically, the Internet—and you assholes who use it—prizes gimmicks (what’s up ramen burger) over substance. And, you know, he’s probably right! As I said earlier, the Internet kills tons of stuff, so why not ramen? Of course, I am not a professional chef and tend to hold the opinion that while food trends will come and go, there really isn’t anything wrong with the fact that more and more people have access to more and more varieties of food than at any other time in our entire civilization’s history. But that’s just me. And I’m biased, you know, because the Internet hasn’t killed me yet. In fact, so far? It’s only made me STRONGER. (Which, I think, is usually the first sign of impending Internet death, but whatever. I’m ready.)
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