Sarah Palin Imagines What Christmas Would Be Like If Jesus Were Aborted

abortionabortionabortion! christmaschristmaschristmas! libertylibertyliberty! pukepukepuke!
abortionabortionabortion! christmaschristmaschristmas! libertylibertyliberty! pukepukepuke!

It’s Friday. It’s raining. And some of us (me!) have spent far too much time today fuming and rage-vomiting because of the despicable lows to which conservative politicians descend. But before you just throw up your hands and finish your hate-reading for the day, wait! There’s one more terrible thing said by a terrible person that needs to be addressed in a (sadly) futile attempt to address and maybe stem the tide of terrible shit that’s released upon this world. But so, brace yourself. Because this is terrible.

Everybody’s favorite governor vice-presidential candidate author Sarah Palin has just come out with a new book Good Tidings and Great Joy: Protecting the Heart of Christmas, and—as any diligent author must—is going around the country promoting it at bookstores and institutions of higher learning. Well, I guess you could call Liberty University, the 32-year-old ultra-religious college founded by televangelist Jerry Falwell an “institution of higher learning.” I wouldn’t. But you could. Anyway. As reported by Raw Story, Palin used her time at Liberty U. to make some jokes about the “lamestream media” and demonstrate how completely she doesn’t understand a single thing about Thomas Jefferson and also to equate people who don’t like having Christmas shoved down their throats as being akin to wanting Christ “aborted” right of Christmas. Wait. What?

That’s right. Palin is alarmed by the “angry atheists” who don’t like the fact that front yards are decorated with “a plastic Jewish family” and are trying to “to abort Christ from Christmas.” In other words, Sarah Palin is perhaps certifiably insane. The fact that even she would stoop so low as to bring abortion into a conversation about Christmas is surprising even to those of us (me!) who have an extremely, extremely low opinion of her already. Never mind the fact that it is impossible to abort someone who has been dead for a couple millennia. It’s just ridiculous that anyone could get so worked up over an issue (by which I mean the “war on Christmas”) that isn’t in any way a real thing at all. I mean, even in New York—the atheist/Jewish/Muslim capital hellhole of America—it’s impossible to get away from Christmas. It’s everywhere! Although, come to think of it, it is true that many intelligent people today would probably advise a 14-year-old girl who doesn’t even know how she got pregnant to head to the nearest Planned Parenthood. Even so, talking about aborting Jesus is insane. Is it as insane as Rick Santorum comparing Obamacare to apartheid? Hard to say! This country is full of crazy, crazy people. Have a good weekend everybody!

Follow Kristin Iversen on twitter @kmiversen


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