Brooklyn Dentists Declare War on Halloween

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Nothing against dentists, but they are basically the Grinches of Halloween. The dudes looking after your molars are not amped about the annual influx of fun-sized Snickers bars and mini tootsie-rolls into your diet, and for probably a good reason. So a group of New York City dentists have teamed up to offer bribes to kids in exchange for some of their sweet, sweet trick-or-treating dividends. The War on Halloween is real.

Seventeen dentists across the city, including Bay Ridge’s Dr. Robert Souferian, will be hosting events for the national Halloween Candy Buyback, DNA Info reports. The deal is that kids can exchange candy for money, $1/pound for up to 5 pounds. Sure, that’s not a great deal, but it’s probably better than having it all eaten by your younger siblings or slowly reach a questionable level of staleness hidden in a pillowcase in the top of your closet. Plus children are dumb! (We kid, we kid.) Also, the dentists round up.

The confiscated candies aren’t going to be incinerated on some sort of giant candy bonfire, though. The dentists bundle it up and send it to troops overseas, who presumably have enough discipline to not just go on an all-candy diet. They also send toothbrushes over, so those soldiers can get those chompers squeaky clean.

It’s not the only place to offer a similar exhcange. At Montefiore’s Children’s Hospital, children with diabetes can exchange the candy they collect for gifts. And that, forgive us, is pretty sweet.

 

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